Every year there is an exhibition in Dublin called “The Ideal Homes Exhibition”. But it’s not so much about homes as about the places in which people live, and the furnishing of those places. It should really be called “The ideal houses exhibition”.
There is a big difference between a house and a home. A house is where people keep their furniture and belongings. A home is where people live together. Sadly, it seems that some homes are meant more for the security and convenience of the furniture than for the people who live in them.
Some homes are so neat and tidy that they are not fit to be lived in – if you know what I mean. To look at them you’d never suspect that people lived there. They are more like museums than homes. On the other hand, other homes remind you of a well-thumbed book. It’s obvious that people live in them, people who know how to relax and to enjoy themselves.
To have a home is not just to have a house. It is to have a set of familiar surroundings, habits, routines, and neighbors. It is to have roots. It is to have a clear and unmistakable identity. It is to have a set of close ties with –people who accept us for what we are, and who give us a sense of belonging. These are the things that constitute that unique feeling — the feeling of being at home.
People put a lot of effort and money into building a good house. And one can understand why. But perhaps there is a danger of neglecting the more important thing – building a home, that is, a little community of love.
The atmosphere in the home is far more important than the quality and quantity of the furnishings. The atmosphere is determined by the quality of the relationships. Jesus too needed a home in which to grow up. Mary and Joseph provided that home for him at Nazareth. By their love for him and for one another, Mary and Joseph created the atmosphere in which he thrived. But the Holy Family didn’t have an easy life, as the Gospel shows us.
During the early years they suffered the fate of homeless refugees. The family is very fragile in our times. It is under many stresses and difficulties. Yet, in spite of every-thing, many parents make enormous sacrifices for their children. All such parents can draw inspiration from the example of Mary and Joseph.
Ideally home is the place to which we can always return, and be sure of a welcome. It is a place where we taste on earth the joy and peace of the place God has for us in heaven. Ideally there is no place like home. But there is no such place as an ideal home.